Never thought that the tales of my parenthood would bring me to start this blog, but I couldn't help the notion that many of us, to keep our sanity, my laugh at the things we have to tell our children each day. From just the time they breath their first breath to the day was marry them off, we find ourselves giving them advice, tending to their wounds, disciplining their disobedience, holding them close, and protecting them from danger. As a proud father of three, I get a glimpse of our heavenly Father each day from the musings that I bring to the table. You and I are made in His image. I heard Jeff Allen, a Christian comedian once say, "God must have made teenagers as revenge on mankind. Why else would He make something that ignore what He had to say and deny His existence." I hope that in light of parenthood, you understand and laugh.
I found myself at the store recently with my oldest daughter, my wife, and my middle child. this was shortly before our newborn was to arrive. She was smart. She stayed in the womb to avoid this madness. We had just picked up half the store and put it in our cart. The girls had been running around crazy (yes....I became that parent that couldn't get them out of the aisle...) and I had had enough. I told the oldest, Maleah, to stand at the end of the check out counter and not move. She listened. For a minute. Next thing I know, I look down by the cart because I saw something out of the corner of my eye move and to my horror, there Maleah was....licking the floor. I never would have imagined telling my child to stop licking the floor. Have you ever wondered what goes through a two year old's head? "Hm....this floor looks yummy...think I will lick it." Seriously? Maybe it was the gum residue or the lolly pop crust that made her desire to lick the floor. Whatever the case may be, I found that she will be forever dubbed....The Floor Licker.
I found myself at the store recently with my oldest daughter, my wife, and my middle child. this was shortly before our newborn was to arrive. She was smart. She stayed in the womb to avoid this madness. We had just picked up half the store and put it in our cart. The girls had been running around crazy (yes....I became that parent that couldn't get them out of the aisle...) and I had had enough. I told the oldest, Maleah, to stand at the end of the check out counter and not move. She listened. For a minute. Next thing I know, I look down by the cart because I saw something out of the corner of my eye move and to my horror, there Maleah was....licking the floor. I never would have imagined telling my child to stop licking the floor. Have you ever wondered what goes through a two year old's head? "Hm....this floor looks yummy...think I will lick it." Seriously? Maybe it was the gum residue or the lolly pop crust that made her desire to lick the floor. Whatever the case may be, I found that she will be forever dubbed....The Floor Licker.
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